Sicknesses of 2009

This year has been our hardest one yet as far as sicknesses. In perspective, none if it is a really big deal because everyone is healthy for the most part. Braedon has yet another ear infection...it is like the 4th or 5th one this year. Andrew and I both have sinus junk going on, probably infection. Kaley went to the Dr. at the same time Braedon did on Monday and he said she had viral croup and that it wasn't in her chest or anything so she would be fine but we just had to let it run it's course. A good friend of mine thought her baby may have whooping cough so she was contacting everyone who has been around them just as a precaution. I called the Dr. just to ask for advice and they scheduled an appointment to check her out first thing Friday morning. In response to what was diagnosed Monday, the Dr. came in and said, "well, you know viruses will last about 7-10 days so you are in the middle." He also said, "she looks perky and happy so I am sure she is fine but let's just have a look and listen." As soon as he listened to her breathing, his face dropped and he said he was really concerned about her and that he would never have guessed by looking at her that anything was wrong. He called it reactive airway disease, which is where her airways are sensitive to other things going on in her body. In this case, her airways had reacted negatively to the croup and tightened up causing her situation to change dramatically since Monday. With that diagnosis, we are thrust into the world of breathing treatments and steroids. She also was prescribed an antibiotic to clear up a sinus infection. I can't believe my five month old baby is on so much medicine. I thank God that treatment is available but hate the fact that she has to be sick at all. Due to how sick we have all been, this week has been the roughest yet for me as for being a wife and a mommy. I failed miserably at being the gentle, loving, nurturing, encouraging, wife and mother that God has called me to be. I know that I am only human and continue to fall short of the glory of God and am so happy to be forgiven and washed clean by the blood of Jesus Christ. However, it still takes a while for everything to get back to normal. While I am not really beating myself up about it anymore I am still trying to figure out how to get back on the horse...I haven't spent any time in the Word or dedicated prayer in a little over a week because I have either been sleep deprived and depressed, taking care of someone else who is sick since the whole family has been, or actually sleeping (or trying). While I am not sleep deprived, sick, angry, or depressed anymore I don't necessarily feel spirit-filled. I am constantly reminding myself of the standard I want to live by, which is, "I do what I know is right and pleasing to the Lord, whether I feel like it or not." So, I am off to start by praying and reading my bible.